by Nancy Bloom

1. Listen to the audible voices of Nature – Frogs chanting, crickets singing, flowing waters of streams and creeks, wind in the pines, a lake lapping against the shore, birdsongs, ocean waves against the beach or crashing on the rocks, rain falling…all have their songs to delight your ears! See how many more voices you can hear in the natural world. And remember we as humans are nature too! Human Nature. A baby’s laugh, a mother’s lullaby, sounds of children playing, these too are sounds of Nature.

2. Open with your whole being to receive the Presences of Nature around and near you – Rocks, sunsets, trees, ground, waters, birds, plants, rain, stars, lizards, sunlight, bees, wildlife, springs, cliffs, hail and more.

3. Listen with your inner ear to the messages that each presence in Nature gives you. Everything you listen to deeply will speak to you. A rock, a waterfall, a sunset, a mist, a river, a blade of grass, a boulder, an owl or dragonfly, each has a gift for you of deeper understanding, new ways of being and knowing. I invite you to listen to everything in Nature , from the vast to the tiny, they all may be your teachers.

4. Sense the Natural World around you, opening to the touch of the air on your skin the way it is in a particular place, or the felt sense of a waterfall nearby and how it refreshes you, the welcome warmth of sunlight on your body, the reverberations of thunder, the softness of sand, the smoothness of a small rock, the roughness of some lava rock, the coolness of a leaf with morning dew on it. The things you touch touch you…The things you sense awaken your senses!

5. Open to your own Nature as you open to and resonate with the Natural World around you. Who are you then? Who are you becoming?

May you enjoy the many gifts of Listening to Nature this summer!

Doorways of Support and Inspiration: Facing Obstacles

Mining the Gold that Dealing with Trauma and Adversity Present
by Nancy Bloom (with Alissa Lukara), © 2001

One of the valuable lessons I’ve learned in my life is that life has cycles, and when we’re going through adversity and trauma, they could possibly be a cycle, instead of an never-ending downward tren d. In my early twenties, before I realized this, I thought that because I was in an abyss, I would always be in an abyss. It seemed like the direction the abyss went was perpetually down, towards more adversity and trauma, and that’s where I was going, too. I didn’t have a clue then that life had cycles.

This Too Shall Pass

There’s a wonderful Zen story about a king. As he was about to die, he called his three sons to him one by one. To the oldest son he said, “To you, my oldest son, I gift all my realms and principalities. May you govern them well.” To the second son he said, “To you, my son, I give all my estates. May you run them in a good fashion that the people might prosper on them and that the harvest might be abundant.” Finally, he called for his youngest son, who was truly his favorite, the child of his heart and soul, the one that he felt so akin to, so close to, and he said to this son, “To you my most beloved, I gift what is most precious of all.” Then, he handed him a ring. And on the inside of the ring was inscribed: “This too shall pass.” This understanding may seem simple, but it is a profound knowing, and in this king’s mind, it was equal to all the kingdoms and principalities he owned.

Remembering this phrase when meeting adversity and trauma can be very helpful. Yet, in some life challenges, the outer circumstances don’t seem to pass. Some may truly be experiencing a life-threatening or chronic illness or difficulties that seem to linger. Here, too, however, the saying has relevance, because what can still pass are the fearful or angry responses to any situation-including death, so that new, more healing, loving responses can be invited into people’s lives, even in the midst of the adversity or trauma.

Stop Judging Your Feelings

I’ve also learned from personal experience-and discuss it often with clients-that, even when outer circumstances remain challenging, we can invite ourselves not to feel bad about feeling bad. If we’re already feeling bad, it’s enough already. But what happens is that, on top of this, we often judge ourselves for feeling bad. Doing so heaps insult on injury and undermines us. It’s just this added burden that can often push us over the edge. We’re better off not judging what we’re feeling or undergoing, but instead allowing and observing the actual grief or anger or illness, whatever it is.

When you judge yourself for your feeling or experience, you set up a situation where you’re resisting the feeling and not accepting it. “Oh, I’m angry. I shouldn’t be.” Or, “I shouldn’t be this angry over that.” And, as you get caught in this critical mode, you can actually perpetuate the feeling, get stuck in that place longer than if you just let it pass through without judgment.

One way to bypass this self-judgment is through the path of non-resistance. Here, you let whatever you’re feeling or experiencing pass through you, like sunlight passing through a pane of glass. You’re not grabbing hold of it and getting knotted up in it. If fear comes up, you say to yourself, “OK, here’s fear.” Then, you let it pass through, and there it goes. When, instead of accepting what’s happening or what we’re feeling, we get caught in thinking, “Make it not be like this. Or, I’ve got to get through this fast. Why is this taking so long? Or, I shouldn’t be feeling this,” we can suffer even more.

Mine the Gold of What Is

The invitation is to mine the gold of what is. We tend to think that the gold is only in certain circumstances or ways of being. Being happy. Looking pretty. Being healthy. But there are gifts even in the adversity and trauma in life. And often it may even be that our soul might in some way want to experience this adversity and trauma in order to extract the gifts. My perception is that the sooner we extract the gifts and the learning that life challenges offer, the better able we are to move on.

Consider the different ways of perceiving the situation-are you’re looking at it with the glass half-full vision of it or with the glass half-empty? Last night I was describing to a friend that I was feeling a bit depressed and kind of empty. We were discussing my age, which is 56 and the major astrological event that happens at that time known as the Saturn return. It is associated with a lot of letting go, shifting and restructuring in people’s lives. So I was talking about how things are changing and falling away and how I have less energy than I am used to having. On that day, I felt particularly low energy and found myself frustrated and saddened by that.

This was me feeling bad about feeling bad.

My friend, however, took another perspective. “You know,” she said, “it sounds to me like you are softening.” When I heard that, I was able move beyond my initial perception and look inventively at the big picture of what was happening. Now, as I looked once more at my low energy and despondency, what I saw was: “Oh, I’m deepening.” I unearthed another way to look at the situation. Saying “I’m deepening” gives me empowerment in my soul as I make the journey.

Meeting Suffering with Grace

In our culture, we live with an a kind of belief that says, “You should be happy; everything should be going well. You shouldn’t be sick. If you are sick or unhappy, there’s something wrong with you.” In Buddhist teachings, it is understood that life includes suffering. And I think if we understand that, too, then when suffering comes, we no longer think, “There’s something wrong with me, I’m a lacking person.” Instead, we say, “Oh, here’s this part of life. How do I meet it?” And perhaps sometimes, we can invite ourselves to meet adversity and trauma with the utmost grace that we can muster-and the utmost presence.

For example, when my recent partnership ended, I essentially felt like I was going through a second divorce. I thought here it comes again, the same thing. The relationship ended similarly to my first marriage with the person departing to be with someone else. At the demise of my first marriage, I felt angry and distraught, somewhat vengeful. Then, when the second one came around, I felt very hurt and sad, but this time I thought, “Here is the invitation to do this differently.” I really tried to go through the end of the second partnership in the most conscious, caring way that I could- and it felt so better to meet the same situation in a new manner.

One of the things I did differently the second time, was to be there for myself and for my grief. I cried every day for three months. I couldn’t help myself. Various things would come up that would trigger my tears. Someone might ask me, “Oh, how’s Rick?” and I was suddenly sobbing. Instead of judging that , however, I thought to myself, “This is what I need to do. This is sad territory and I need just to feel my feelings.” That helped a lot. I stopped working against myself or trying to be anywhere other than where I was. I also sought to be more conscious and caring with my ex-partner and we met to debrief with one another. That felt a lot better than getting polarized. After a time, my feelings began to normalize again.

We’re not “the only one”

What I’ve learned myself and what I see in others is that when we go through any kind of huge change or challenge, we can expect for some feelings to arise. I recently interviewed some people involved with a teen program for young women, and they discussed the challenges of that life passage into young womanhood-all the dangers of negative self-image, cliques, feeling outcast and experiencing low self esteem. To counteract that, they’re doing activities in nature with these young women, healthy risk-taking kinds of things, like rope courses and such. They also have groups where the women talk together, and one of the young women was saying how important it was to be able to talk about the challenges they were experiencing with others who were undergoing them-to find out that she is not the only one who feels she is left out of groups or weird or that she doesn’t look right.

In general, when we are dealing with any kind of adversity, trauma or challenge, we realize, “Oh, this territory that I’m in is one that other people are in, too, and it’s normal that I’m feeling upset, or discouraged or angry or sad,” then we feel reassured. We discover that other people experience what we do, too. We are not alone.

Nancy Bloom, who has an M.A. in psychology and is a certified hypnotherapist, has been a spiritual counselor and healer since 1975. Her focus is on inspiring people with life and health challenges to be more healthy and whole. Her individual sessions (in person and by phone) and workshops incorporate a variety of approaches, including psychosynthesis, hands on healing, psychic readings, and soul retrieval. She has also produced 2 recordings of healing music: Spirits Walking in the Wind, and Sweet Sacred Mystery, along with three recordings of spoken word to support the healing process set to music-Inner Harmony, Inner Transformation and Inner Beauty. The recordings cover areas ranging from relaxation and grounding to healing light, breath and personal transformation work to guidance in experiencing positive health shifts. Contact Nancy Bloom at PO Box 921, Ashland, OR 97520, 541-621-2181, nancy@SpiritinBloom.com or visit the Spirit In Bloom website.

Alissa Lukara is a writer and president and originator of the Life Challenges Web site. Contact her at alissal@lifechallenges.org

Copyright © 1999 Life Challenges. This article originally appeared on the Life Challenges website, which helps people face and transform adversity.

Doorways of Support and Inspiration: Facing Obstacles

Becoming the Artist of Your Day; a Reframing Process
by Nancy Bloom, © 2001

A lot of us make lists about what we’re going to do every day. Most of these lists include work and chore-related things like: take the car to the repair shop, call the people on my committee, finalize the report, etc, etc-generally not the kinds of things that inspire you to leap out of bed in the morning.

I’m proposing that you create a different kind of list-one that can shift the whole experience of your day-regardless of the challenges you face. On this list, you consider: “Given the kind of day that it is and given that I have certain things I need to do, how do I want my day to be?” In essence, creating this list lets you become the artist of your day.

For example, when my son was still in diapers, I lived in an isolated spot an hour’s drive from the nearest Laundromat. Before I knew about becoming an artist of my day, I would think, “I don’t like to drive and now I have to drive a whole hour to the Laundromat to do my laundry, an experience I also don’t enjoy.” After I had the listing process, I would write: “I will meet at least one wonderful person at the Laundromat and have a marvelous connection with him or her. I will totally enjoy my drive to town.” This was during the time when there were gas lines at the gas station, which I used to resist as well, so I would also write: “I will really enjoy waiting in the gas line.” Having written this, I was inspired to think of things to enhance that waiting experience, like bringing a poetry book I had been wanting to read.

Doing the list worked. Instead of moving through the day with dread, I enjoyed myself. I appreciated the beautiful countryside on my drive. I met some wonderful people at the Laundromat, and I thoroughly enjoyed reading my book while waiting in the gas line.

Now, when I’m being the artist of my day, I’ll include things on my list like: “All my interactions today are heartwarming and fulfilling and really bless everyone concerned.” Or, “The presentation I am doing today goes really well and is transformative for all concerned. My preparation for it flows easily and well.” Today, I was aware of having low energy, so I wrote: “Everything I do today is done by grace through me. I don’t really have to effort.”

How To Paint Your Day

When creating your own list, think of it as making a painting of your day. As the artist, decide:

• What are the pieces I want or need to include in the picture?
• Where do I need to put some bright spots? Maybe you’re continually busy and over-worked and only have 20 minutes for lunch. What can you do to add some brightness and nourish yourself in that time. Perhaps you can go outside and get some sun or really stop to look at and appreciate the flowers.
• What attitude do I want to convey and carry through this painting, through this day? For example, “Today, I move through my entire day with an attitude of gratitude.” “Today I’m fully present in everything I do.” “Today, if I have a tendency to condemn myself, I quickly move to self-forgiveness.”

Creating this list doesn’t require much time. You can do it in two minutes in the morning while sitting down to have tea or coffee, or in the evening before you go to bed. If your day starts going haywire from the first moment you awaken, get out a piece of paper at 2 p.m. and paint a picture of the rest of your day. I once read an example from Unity Church, which suggested that if you’re in the middle of a difficult meeting at work, take out your list and write down something like: “This meeting with resolve harmoniously, and we will agree on two points about which we will all feel good by the end of the afternoon.” Don’t worry about anyone at the meeting wondering what you’re writing. While you’re choreographing how you want the meeting to go, others will simply think you are taking notes. One of my clients successfully uses this process at meetings all the time.

Reframing Major Challenges

Becoming an artist of your day can help you reframe major challenges, such as health concerns, as well. While you may not be able to choreograph the circumstance that has occurred, you can influence your response to it. One of my clients was a woman in her sixties with lung cancer. One lung had already been removed and, once a week, she was driving a great distance, a couple hours each way, over twisty roads to get radiation. The amazing thing was that she continued to have the energy to make the drive and experienced no side effects to the radiation whatsoever. The doctor was mystified and asked her, “Why is it that you, amongst all my patients, are having no side effects?” She said, “Because every time you put that machine over me, I say, “Thank you lord for your healing, thank you lord for your healing.”

If you have a major health challenge, think of how you want the events of your own day to unfold. Your own list of the day might include items such as: “I experience this medical intervention as truly healing.” “The doctors and nurses today are divinely inspired as my healers.” “I feel supported and cared for in all my interactions with doctors, nurses, technicians and other medical professionals.”

Regardless of the kind of list you create, remember-your thoughts have power. Your words have power. There’s power in the kinesthetic action of writing. And, above all, your intention has power. In combination, they help you become the artist of your day.

Copyright © 1999 Life Challenge

 

Reclaiming/Kindling What You Want In Life

Moving Away from What Doesn’t Work Towards What You Want : An Empowerment Process
by Nancy Bloom, © 2001

When you go through life challenges, you may discover that certain areas of your life are no longer working. You’re out on a limb getting shaken up. Sometimes, you’re so caught up in your situation that you even lose sight of your dreams.

While you may not be able to choreograph all the outer situations in your life and make the dance exactly as you want, you can at least decide to choreograph your response to them. As part of this, you can begin to move away from what’s not working in your life and to move instead in the direction you want to go. I have a three list process, originally inspired by a process I learned from Unity minister and author Catherine Ponder, which can help you do this.

List number one. What do you now choose to eliminate from your life?

Many times, when you experience a sudden or major transition, you notice what hasn’t been working in your life. This is an occasion to grab hold and make some positive changes. Maybe you don’t even have a choice. You have to change to respond to what’s occurring in your life.

During this time, ask yourself what you would like to let go of in your life. List it in this first list. Include everything-from the most mundane item, like the clutter in your closet, to the most cosmic, like self-judgment, self-hatred or friendlessness-whatever conditions you are ready to release. You can even include health conditions. Your heart and soul will know everything that belongs on this list.

Why doing this list can be helpful is because setting the intention to eliminate and actually eliminating what doesn’t work in your life makes space for what does. Nature abhors a vacuum. As soon as you get rid of those things, new good can come in.

When you complete the list, you then help empower the process by including this written statement at the end:

I thank these for the growth they’ve given me. I now release them, and they release me to my own highest good.

Making a huge list of everything you want to eliminate from your life can be somewhat intimidating. When, however, you thank what you’re letting go of for the growth it’s provided, you’re essentially saying that you let go of the condition, but you choose to keep the growth and learning you’ve received. You’re not letting go of everything. Some of you recognize what those gifts and learning have been. Others may not consciously know. You may find it beneficial to take some time as part of this to think about and write down what gifts and learning you’ve received from even the most difficult life challenges that you’re hoping to release.

This statement is also important, because if you keep identifying what you don’t want, you often become hypnotized by it. Writing “I release them” is the gesture of open hands saying “I let it go.” By releasing your hold or fixation on them, they release you, too.

List number two. What do I now choose to manifest in my life? (bring into my life, create in my life-You choose the words that feel best)

This list encompasses everything that you want your life to include-once more from the most mundane to more expansive things. It can include things like positive attitudes, feeling states, and health. It can include situations like financial support and the types of relationships you want. Use the first list to help direct you. For example, if you write on the first list: “I now eliminate friendships or people that are toxic,” you might write on the second list, “I now draw into my life friendships that meet me on a soul level, where we are healing for each other, and we grow together.”

Relationships are an important factor to consider on this list because your life challenge may be inviting you to change the whole context of your life, and this second list can help you identify and focus on the types of people who can assist you in leaping forward into your next stage of greater well-being. You also need support during life challenges, so if you’re letting go of draining relationships or lack of relationships on the first list, you might ask to draw in supportive contacts and friends on the second list.

Let this second list be wildly imaginative. Say what you really want, even though it seems unlikely you’ll get it.

I’ve found time and time again, that when I or my clients put something on a list, it very often does happen. As a result, you have to be careful what you wish for and be fairly specific. It may be unwise to write simply: “I want to fall in love.” A better approach would be: “I want to be in a loving relationship with someone who is really good for me and where I’m really good for them.”

There may be some instances where you know what you want to let go of, but you don’t exactly know with what you want to replace it. For example, you want to leave your current job, but you don’t know what job you want next. Instead of writing down the specific work you want on your second list, consider the qualities or circumstances surrounding a job that you’d enjoy: What do you want to feel about your work? Do you want to feel glad to get up in the morning and go there? Do you want to feel like you can be yourself all day long? Do you want to feel at ease with your co-workers, manager and customers? Do you want to feel that you’re receiving adequate money for your needs? Writing down the tenor of what you want, even when you don’t know the specifics can still help draw something wonderful to you.

This list has an ending statement to empower the process, too:

May this or something better come to me through no harm to anyone and for the greater good of all concerned.

The “something better” is important because, at the same time you think you know what you’d like to have happen with your limited human awareness, the universe (spirit, god, higher power) might have an even better idea that you haven’t thought of yet. You want to stay open to that greater will.

The second half of the statement-“through no harm to anyone and for the greater good of all concerned”-says that, as you generate your own greater good, you have a true desire that no one be harmed in the process and that you want your good to include greater good for the whole. We can feel positive when we receive what we want, because we ask that there be blessings in it for others as well. In addition, many of us don’t feel worthy to have something good for ourselves, but when we affirm it in a way that’s for the greater good, we relax and allow it, and it does indeed then bless others, which blesses us again.

Here’s an example of how this second list can work. Once, I was living very rurally in a 17 1/2 foot yurt with wood heat and no running water. I wanted to move into town, so I listed everything I desired in a new home: a beautiful natural setting five minutes from town; a cozy but spacious feeling; roommates with whom I shared a lot and who grew together; a big workshop room; people with whom I would have an ongoing relationship; hot and cold running water; a wonderful bathtub; a swimming pool; a sauna; a hot tub-all by September 1. When I finished the list, I thought, Nancy, you’re crazy. I put it away and didn’t think about it again. That summer, I had an opportunity to give some workshops in a beautiful house, and the people who lived there asked me to be their roommate-as long as I could move in September 1. The house had every single thing I had written on the list. That was in 1984 and 15 years later, while I now live elsewhere, I still give workshops in the house and continue to be friends with the people who live there.

Clients with whom I’ve shared the list have found it powerful, too. Some have used it to get over phobias, find new jobs, and so on. One client shared it with her hairdresser who had left an abusive relationship with the father of her children. She was still suffering from low self-esteem, yet she went home and wrote down 81 things she wanted in a new partner. Within one year, she found a person who had 80 of the 81 qualities, so she said, “I guess I better marry him now.” She did and they have a wonderful relationship. Most people aren’t going to be that specific, but even three or four well thought out, personally meaningful items can be very impactful.

List number three. What I am grateful for.

Once more, list everything from the smallest thing that you’re grateful for to the most cosmic. Nothing more than that. I encourage you to make this list at least as long as the others. I just did this three list process the other day, and I noticed that my manifesting list was very long, so I really pushed myself to do more on my gratefulness list.

For a long while, I was mystified as to why this whole process worked for so well. Now, I believe, that while each aspect is important to the result, including the act of writing itself, it’s this last list that is the fuel of the process. I realized that if you have a list of what you don’t want, but it still exists in your life-and you have a list of what you do what, and it’s not here yet, you can feel dissatisfied or despondent. The gratefulness list helps you step into another level of awareness, where you’re telling yourself, “Even in this situation or challenge, there are so many blessings in my life.” As soon as you go to that place, your being relaxes, and it allows the universe to follow the flow of what you’ve culled in and culled out of your life.

Another benefit of making a gratitude list during times of transition and change is that it’s a good antidote to despondency. You don’t have to do it just as part of this process. I recently did a process recommended by a speaker I heard where I immediately wrote ten things for which I was grateful, then added one more each day for forty days. When I was finished, I missed the process, so I started it again. I was also captivated by Sarah Ban Breathnach’s suggestion from her book, Simple Abundance, which she discussed on Oprah Winfrey’s show. She suggested you write down five things you’re grateful for every day before you go to bed, an act which Oprah personally found life-changing.

Create a Ceremony

Doing the whole listing process as a ceremony can be especially healing and empowering, because it makes what you’re doing more real to the body. The very act of writing the lists themselves can be a ceremony if you take this action in the spirit of a ritual. It’s as if you’re taking these things out of yourself and putting them on a page. You’re making a statement to the universe about what you want you want to release, blessing and releasing it. You’re acknowledging what you want your life to encompass at this point and calling those things or something better in. You’re expressing gratitude.

You can also take this a step further and create a more elaborate ritual. For example, you could paint all the things you’re releasing on rocks with water colors. Put them in a stream and they’ll get washed downstream or, at least, the water color will get washed away. Thank them for their growth and release them. During the same ceremony, call in what you want and make your second statement. Maybe you want to take something from that natural spot that symbolically represents what you’re calling in.

Once you’ve done the lists as a ritual with yourself, I suggest that you put them aside for a few days. Then revisit them and notice: “Did I leave anything out? Do I need to add anything or change any wording, so that it really fits me?”

If you want, you can empower the lists with someone else. I invite my clients to bring their completed lists to a session and we read them out loud. We honor them.

Once you’re happy with your lists as they is, that’s it. You’re complete. You don’t have to keep looking at them every day or affirming or visualizing them. You’ve done it. You’ve sent the information all out to the universe, so you can simply set the lists aside in a drawer or some other place. In a sense, you’ve planted them. Now don’t go dig them out and look at them every day to make sure they’re sprouting. That disturbs the gestation and growing process. Plant them, let them grow and look forward to the wonderful surprises in store.

Don’t feel badly if not everything on your list happens either. As I mentioned, sometimes we don’t know what’s for the greater good. At the very least, I see these lists as a clarification of your values. They clarify what you want to move away from and move towards. There’s great power in what you say “Yes” to in your life and to what you say “No.” I knew a woman who badly scalded her hand right before company was coming for dinner. She got very angry and forcefully shouted out “No”-refusing to accept the burn. When she looked down, it had disappeared! Forcefully saying “Yes” can have powerful results, too.

If things are falling apart in your life, think of these lists like sand bags. The flood is imminent. Maybe putting sand bags up will be enough to stave off the flood waters. Maybe it won’t. But you have to try something. The lists can help sway the percentages in your favor. Have faith and expect a miracle. Doing so paves the way for energy to flow. Conversely, when you fear the worst, you can get in your own way. Research has shown how observers’ thoughts can affect the finest particles of matter. At least focus your dreams and free will in the direction you want to go. At the same time, work on being okay with what is-whatever that is.

Most life challenges, whether you like it or not, come to you in some form that may feel like a death, where you’re letting go of the form of life as you knew it. You don’t know the new that’s coming in or how to call this new to you. The three list process can help. Each list shows you what’s important to you, and my experience is that the process and your intention truly do create and move things in your life.

Nancy Bloom, who has an M.A. in psychology and is a certified hypnotherapist, has been a spiritual counselor and healer since 1975. Her focus is on inspiring people with life and health challenges to be more healthy and whole. Her individual sessions (in person and by phone) and workshops incorporate a variety of approaches, including psychosynthesis, hands on healing, psychic readings, and soul retrieval. She has also produced three audiotapes on the healing process set to music-Inner Harmony, Inner Transformation and Inner Beauty. The tapes cover areas ranging from relaxation and grounding to healing light, breath and personal transformation work to guidance in experiencing positive health shifts. Contact Nancy Bloom at PO Box 921, Ashland, OR 97520, 541-621-2181.

Copyright 1999 Life Challenges. This article originally appeared on the Life Challenges website, which helps people face and transform adversity.